Do you use four-letter words and expletives to fill your day? Good for you. Is your speech fraught with scurrility and the imperious ribaldry of an ill-tempered sea captain? Party on, Wayne. If you cuss like a Martin Scorsese character and think it just fine then no worries, bro. More power to you. But this thread is probably not for you
Quite a long time ago, I figured cussing like a sailor around children would be a bad idea so I started using “replacements” I had read in books or seen in movies.
I, uh, kept a log today thinking I might need to cut down on colorful metaphors. Here is today’s list of some of the expletives used and the number of times it was said.
Whatever gets you through the day, right?
(x4) Merlin’s Beard!
(x1) For the LOVE of BENJI!
(x3) Stars and Stones!
(x1) Empty Night!
(x1) Shut the Front Door!
(x1) SWEET Blue Blazes
Friend: “Why isn’t the repairman here yet?”
Me: “because he is an overweening pe’taQ.”
Also, at one point today our water was out, I peered out the window at the malfunctioning pump and asked a family member to bring me my holy hand grenade. Not my finest hour.
If you like, please chime in with any substitutions you have used. Some of the above are from Star Trek, Dresden Files novels, Monty Python, Harry Potter, Battlestar Galactica, etc.