Long distance relationship

#Sleazy

Because it wasnt intended to be a relation, ever :smile: Also, as I said, we were very against falling into new relations when we have met. So that time was just needed for everything to bloom.

@Hairyskinback, Nice to see that you came back to the game.

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My reason for the 2 yr wait was I still had health issues to deal with. I had weight to lose and still had a stress type illness that I could not shake. It would hit me and for about 3 weeks I was totally down and not functioning like a normal person.

Still with joining a gym and making new friends these bouts slowly got less and when I had not had one for over 4 months I decided to take the plunge and go and so I did. Leaving everything behind with no true idea how I would cope or if we would work. It will be 4yrs on May 5th 2017 and for a guy that made a lot of mistakes this was most likely the smartest choice I ever made.

Lol, not playing but still get a email every so often and this topic caught my eye. I am currently hooked on pokemon the card game online. Once more in the cycle of playing to get as much of the collection as possible :slight_smile: Thank you for your kindness though.

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I have never understood long distance relationships… I don’t know how people can make it work.

I would simply be “faking it” if I were in a long distance relationship.

So congratulations to people that actually somehow make them work, my hats off to you.

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Most people get caught up in superficial stuff like material goods, or beauty of the body or some easy distraction when it comes to relationships. When you take someone to the movies, you are not talking to them, you are being physical with them. You are training yourself that as long as their body is ok their personality does not matter. Same with taking them to dinner, or lunch. You are doing something that involves not being able to properly communicate. Most relationships that hit marriage are simply not ready for it, however in the depths of the mind people have trained themselves to think “if i do not do this i will lose them forever.” Even now most marriages that end in divorce are based on looks because someone’s body has changed. In a long distance relationship you can not see the person, only imagine them (unless in video call) and this basically trains you to use your word, and communicate with them. It is a slow process, but it is like cultivating a friendship. The more you talk to each other, the more you learn about their past, the more you get to know about them, the more you learn about their personality. Dating is still at its core a learning experience, and those who fail that experience just could not do all the proper work therein. Each person in the relationship is like a teacher, but also a student. Teachers who will quiz and test to see if you are making the cut. We see guys who have been with many girls and who gloat at how many girls they have been with and who are “bad boys” but those types are the actual losers in a relationship, not because they got a bunch of girls to date them but because they could not get one to keep till death to each other. The same is true for women, there is no harm of being with/sleeping with a bunch of men, it is about finding the one you can never live without. Women are not looking for a hero, and men should not be playing the villain, we just need to start as friends and work our way from there.

Personally I don’t believe a relationship can work on a emotional connection alone.

I believe both physical and emotional attraction are required to make a relationship work.

As you become more emotionally attracted to someone, their physical attractiveness matters less, but never completely goes away.

If a relationship is purely emotional with zero physical attraction whatsoever, that person is simply a friend and I do not think it will work in the long run.

Does this make me shallow? Possibly, but I feel a physical attraction (at least in some part) is also a requirement.

BTW I have been with extremely attractive girls with no emotional attraction and likewise girls I would outright consider unattractive but we were really strongly connected emotionally. neither worked and I doubt either ever could.

The girl I am with right now, is a nice mix and soon to be my fiance.

That is fair, a nice view of other types of relationships. Sometimes when you have an emotional bond so strong that when you finally see how bad they look, you just go, “i can get used to this if i tried” I have seen other types of relationships that somehow work, some good, and some bad. If it truly works for you, then go for it.

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