GoW Comedy Topic

So let us have a little fun, ladies and gentlemen. I start it off, hopefully you also come up with something. :slightly_smiling:

  • Imagine that awkwardly moment if a bug appears and you face your own defense team. But you just doesnt know it’s your defense team before you check the hero’s name of the enemy team, and that is in the very end of the battle, and you have already lost. :slightly_smiling:
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Pegasus walks into an inn, Barkeep says, “Why the long face?”

A group of psychiatric students are on a tour of the local mental hospital. As they move along the hall they look into a few rooms to see the patients.
The first is swinging an imaginary golf club. He notices the group and says “When I get out of here I’m going to be a golf pro.”
The group moves on and in the second room they look into the patient is swinging an imaginary baseball bat. When he notices the group he says “When I get out of here I’m going to be a professional baseball player”.
As the students and their guide move down the hall they look into a third room and notice the patient laying in his bed masturbating with a peanut on the end of his penis. He looks over and says “I’m f ’ n nuts and never getting out of here!”


Key to GoW, if at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence you tried.

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Diamond: Hey, Ruby, did you hear that I’m getting embedded into a statue next Tuesday?
Ruby: But we were going fishing on Tuesday! You sure you can’t change the date?
Diamond: Sorry Ruby, it’s set in stone.

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hahaha :joy:

hahahaha! Keep it coming! :joy:

I feel that there will be more coming from you. You just not finished yet…

:joy: Mother of God :joy:

A team of archaeologists found a slab of rock with 5 figures carved on it, in order:

A Woman, A Donkey, A Shovel, A Fish, A Star of David.

After months of study, the leader took the rock and went on a lecture tour. He said the carvings were thousands of years old but even so, they revealed a lot about the people of that time.

The woman being placed first in the line of figures showed that women were held in very high esteem - most likely a family oriented culture.

They probably used the donkey to till the fields.
The shovel shows they were highly intelligent as they knew how to make tools.
The fish shows they knew how to augment the crops they raised by also reaping from the sea.
The Star of David of course indicates they were a very religious group of people.

A little old man in the front row finally got the attention of the speaker.

When acknowledged he said, "I’m sorry to blow your conclusions but you were reading it left to right. In Hebrew we read from right to left.

That way it reads, “Holy Mackerel, Dig the A*s on that Chick!”

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hahaha :joy:

Lol, I thought you had to relate it to GoW.
Like when the Dwarf Lord’s wife asked if her new chain mail made her look fat. He replied, “You’re not fat, you’re just easier to see coming.”

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haha, one are free to decide what jokes we gonna make. :slight_smile:

A local Tavern keeper has his horse in a stable behind his business and the horse cries everyday non-stop.

Eventually tired of this the owner puts a sign on the bar offering 1000 gold pieces to anyone that can make his horse stop crying. Many travellers see the sign and go out to the horse to try to stop it’s crying but none succeed.

After a few more weeks a young chap walks in and sees the sign and enquires if the reward is still on offer. The tavern keeper fires him a weary look and says “Can you not hear the damn thing still crying”. “Leave it to me” the young man replies and heads out to the stable. After just a few minutes the horse is laughing itself silly. No more tears just constant loud and uncontrolled laughter. So the young man takes his 1000 GP and leaves a happy but slightly bewildered tavern keeper behind.

Many weeks past and the horse is still laughing, The tavern keeper is again tired of listening to the constant noise and so he puts a new sign on his bar offering 2000 gold pieces to anyone that can stop his horse laughing,

Many try but all are unsuccessful and then the young man appears once more. He again asks if the reward is still available and the owner replies that it is and so once more the young man heads out to the stable.

In just a few minutes the horse is once again crying and the young man returns for his reward. This time the tavern keeper tells the young man he can have his gold but he must explain 1st how he made the horse laugh and then how he made him cry once more.

“That sir”, replied the young man, “is simple, the first time I spoke to the horse I told him my cock was bigger than his and the second time I showed him…”

I’m here all week :smile:

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