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Enter the Nobends

Originally published at: http://gemsofwar.com/enter-the-nobends/
Who you gonna call?

New Troop: Nobend Brothers

A famous tavern song performed by bards throughout Krystara pays homage to three of the most disgraceful Goblins to ever pass outside of Zaejin. Their exploits are dubious, their victories few, and their moral fibre almost non-existant. Nevertheless their deeds have been made into many a bawdy ballad, one of which is included below:

The Sheriff of Delving,
With a look born of fear,
Yelled “Lock up your children,
For the Nobends are here!”

There was big Randy Raven,
And sly little Splog,
And the third Nobend Brother,
Who was just known as Hog.

They strolled into Delving,
Where the Sherrif held sway,
He said “Stop there, you three!”
And he pushed them away.

Well the Nobends just tittered,
As Goblins will do,
Splog kicked in his kneecap,
Drove a spike through his shoe.

Then Raven jumped on him,
Sunk teeth in his thigh.
And Hog grabbed a spoon,
And he scooped out an eye!

The moral of this story
I think you will find…
“Keep your hands off the Nobends,
Or you will go blind!”

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:newspaper: 3 is a crowd, unless we’re talking about the Weekly Threedback Report! :gem::gem::gem:

This group of a troop is as rowdy as any major sports fans, minus any of the sportsmanship.
They may say that third time’s the charm, but there’s nothing charming about this green trio, say “god, please, no” to the Nobend Brothers!

These three pick two spell effects out of a total of four, it’s a rightly-named ‘Crazy’ barrage of options! From reducing attack or dealing damage, to an extra turn or just blowing right up, there’s never a shortage of slapstick for these Stooges.

Pardon me a second to collect my scattered thoughts. […] Alright, back into fray, or should I say fryer?

If you’re looking to cause even more trouble, see what you can cook up with the Arcane Lava Traitstone! Make a mean Gorgon steak with Jarl The Firemantle! Fire things up with Ragnagord! And breath new life into the meal while extinguishing your foes with Emperina!

Or you can just eat away at this barbecue to grow big and strong with Cyclops. Hey, somebody’s gotta make sure everything still tastes alright with how many charred bodies were used for fuel!

:newspaper2: Don’t grill me too hard now, I’ve got a rather tender heart you know. :gift_heart: :sparkle::sparkle::sparkle:

#Match you next time!


Glad their spell got an upgrade. Seemed kind of underwhelming for 12 mana initially.

Definitely like the sound of this!


Tender heart? Oh No nononoo, that’s not a :gift_heart:, that’s your tasty gizzard you’re looking at! Your heart is that rubbery red blob over next to the Sheriff’s… enucleated orb thingy. But I think your charcoal broil analogies are truly spot on, given that it’s Yet More Goblins who have been invited to the party!

Can we say Flame On? There’s little green men crowding my living room. Where’s my hazmat suit?!

Me too! And Lava Arcanes, I also like that. I’ll need at least 28 of those… :slight_smile:

Oh good, the no-bend brothers are here…

can we send them back and just get lava stones :slight_smile:

I was wondering if it was “no-bend” or “nob-end”.

Shush. His kids read this.

I thought it was the nob-end. Cause they’re a bunch of nobs

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fun fact it borders a neighborhood called “the tenderloin” which is basically the hood… the area that borders the 2 is referred to as the “tender nob”

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In Warhammer the Boss-mobs of the Orks are called Nobs. Maybe there is also the origin of this name…


My Gob-Chomper is looking forward to this delicious new three course meal.


Not sure if want to get stone or not, only want one no-bend brothers troop.

Question: Will the Event Chests have an increased likelihood of dropping Gorgons this week?

I can’t seen to ascend the Nobend Brothers to mythic. Legendary worked just fine, but when I try to ascend to mythic I get a

Sorry - [Error_Fuse_Troop_Incosistency]

error… :frowning:

EDIT: Never mind. Attempt number 10 or so was successfull! :slight_smile:

Sadly the thing stopping me from using a red-brown arcane is a distinct lack of red minors.

woohoo the richard cranium brothers have arrived xD

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